| Topic Name: |
why dont women help each other out? |
| Message Name: |
Re:Oprah |
| Date Posted: |
10/04/2000 |
| In Reply To: |
What "mentors" do men have? When do men say..."Hey guys...we have to stick together." True or False - Men are typically more competitive than women.(generally speaking) True or False - Women have selective hearing. True or False - Women work to prove something, men work to accumulate something.
I understand your strides for mentorship...the professional working world is still rather new for women(only 30 years of "real" numbers of women) and many obstacles are being faced by many women today. there is alot of uncertainty...I would assume its understandable. Women want it all...they want to be able to be considered a professional and at the same time be able to start a family. Its VERY difficult and often I wonder what women "really" gain. Men and women ARE different...there are common traits that typically can be seen in each sex...and that has been proven scientifically.
I find it disturbing that you think men enjoy their male superiors(especially those who are "badasses'), and hold a lot of respect for them...certainly NOT.
Actually...you know what...it's rather pointless that I even go on...your beliefs are skewed of how to make life fair when it is an impossibility. You judge people everday and put comments on here as if you don't...as if people should be ashamed of themselves for having the expectations or making assumptions about how your life is. The bottom line is that YOU have to look back on your life and look at what you regret? So i guess my whole point is...Decide what IS REALLY important to you, follow that path, don't find fault in others for not seeing your point of you, and ENJOY your life. Life is not fair, never has been...and this includes everyone...not just women. |
| Message: |
My point actually wasn't that 'life isn't fair' for women and i wasn't complaining about different expectations being the cause of "things being unfair" (if they indeed are, and i'm not sure that's the case.) maybe i didn't articulate myself well enough. i was just trying to come up with an objective explanation for why professional women don't stick up for each other, which was the question the original poster asked. my argument boiled down to: there aren't that many professional women who make their career as serious a priority as most men do (partially because they're not expected to), and therefore, it's just not as likely that women are going to form strong relationships based solely on common career aspirations. i think this is a shame, and disappointing, but i never said it was unfair. and i hate to use the word "mentor" because the connotation tends to be that of 'therapist' or a patronizing version of 'teacher' rather than someoone who will watch out for you at the top because it's in their vested interest to do so. in this sense, men do have mentors, they just don't refer to them as such. i have plenty of (male) banker friends that talk about how they would have never survived their analyst years at their respective i-banks were it not for associate, partner or MD that kept them from fucking up by giving them hints early on about what to do (or not to do.) call it what you want, it's the same thing.
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