The Eight Managerial Office Romance Strategies

1. Adopt a Reasonable Office Romance Policy.

Most companies adopt a "benign neglect" policy towards office romances between coworkers, provided there are no legitimate complaints about performance or keeping the relationship discrete. Many will adopt a more restrictive approach to boss/subordinate relationships, including the ability to transfer or remove the evaluative function of the subordinate to a third party. It makes sense to adopt written reasonable policies, so employees understand the ground rules and feel comfortable in their workplace (see The Office Romancefor the managerial details).

2. Communicate this Policy.

Clearly communicate your firm's reasonable policies on office romance--including who to contact for confidential advice and what procedures to follow in a conflict-of-interest or supervisorial situation. Be sure that every employee understands the corporate climate at your office.

3. Mediate.

When a broken romance spills over into the workplace, restrain the urge to arbitrarily assign blame and transfer or fire the culprit under a one-size-fits-all sexual harassment policy. Instead, suggest mediation to help the couple work out their differences--and the conditions under which to continue working together. A mediator can be a trained facilitator, the company appointed "ombudsman," or even a coworker that both parties respect.

4. Keep the channels of communication open.

Encourage employees to "speak their piece" openly and confidently, regardless of their complaint or concern. A positive, supportive environment fosters not only the airing of problems, but also potential solutions--without an attorney getting into the fray.

5. Follow basic concepts of fairness.

Fairness means employing a neutral and consistent investigation of complaints that treats each party with equal respect--regardless of gender or rank in the workforce. Fairness does not mean addressing every employee's complaint--only the reasonable and legitimate ones.

6. Respond promptly and discreetly to problems.

Reassure employees that valid complaints will be taken seriously. Make your response timely, confidential, and appropriate--whether it's mediation or an investigation. Train your managers on how to properly manage workplace romances.

7. Respect your employees' privacy.

Adopt at least a neutral attitude toward employee dating and other off-the-job behavior, focusing instead on what workers do on company time in meeting corporate goals. Unless you suspect illegal action, do not police your employees or intercept their confidential messages. Don't make employees into "love" police.

8. Be "pro-interactive."

Support concepts of gender equality, day care and elder care, family leave, and other corporate "pro-interactive" policies. Support the inevitable relationships and marriages that will occur. People who enjoy working together in an open, positive environment work better--and to the benefit of their supervisors and the company.

Pro-interactive companies just don't have the same problems as others do. Remember love does win out, despite restrictive policies--and the best employees do leave to work for more progressive organizations.

From The Office Romance: Playing with Fire without Getting Burned by Dennis M. Powers (AMACOM Books, New York, NY).