Top 10 Financial Crisis-Related Halloween Costumes

by Derek Loosvelt | October 29, 2008

  • My Vault
Top 10 financial crisis-related Halloween costumes: How to dress them up. And how to get into character at your All Hallows’ Eve soiree.

10. Ex-Bear Stearns CEO Jimmy Cayne: Gray suit and glasses; carry a deck of cards, 6 iron and Montego Bay-sized spliff. Put your feet up on tables whenever you get a chance, and constantly ask if anyone wants to play a game of Bridge, or burn one down in the men’s room.

9. Mortgage-backed bond trader: Suit and tie, minus the pants. Continually ask others in costume if they’ve seen your pants—because you’ve lost them. (This costume also works for hedge fund manager.)

8. Out-of-work bank robber: Long black overcoat and ski mask (or panty hose over the face). Carry a large firearm, an empty sack emblazoned with a dollar $ign as well as a cardboard sign reading, “PLEASE HELP. HOMELESS & BROKE.”

7. Federal Reserve Chairman Benny Bernanke: White beard, bald spot, blue or gray suit. Look confused as often as possible.

6. Lehman Brothers CEO Dick Fuld: Nixon mask (unless you can find a Dick Fuld mask, which might be possible), sweat suit, Lehman tee shirt, black eye (painted onto the mask); carry a wad of hundreds in your fist, a few bills spilling out of your breast pocket. Ask others to buy you a drink whenever you feel like one and if they refuse, say, “You sure you can’t help out a Brother down on his luck?”

5. Short seller: Carry a pile of dirty gym shorts and, throughout the night, offer them to the lowest bidder.

4. Naked short seller: Same as above but, that’s right, go native.

3. Ex-Morgan Stanley Co-President Zoe Cruz: Earth-tone skirt suit, with a big knife sticking out the middle of your back (fake blood dripping down your calves is a nice additional touch). During the evening, drop this line in as much as you can: “See, that’s what happens when men are left to fend for themselves.”

2. Generic finance job seeker: Any old suit will do. Carry a stack of resumes and pass them out all night (bring your actual resume to kill two birds).

1. Uncle Sam D. Banker: American flag top hat, white wig, white goatee, Paul Smith suit, French-cuffed shirt, dollar-sign cufflinks and Hermes tie. Bring a garbage bag filled with Monopoly money and hand out bills to everyone in sight while saying, “I own you!”

Filed Under: Finance

Happy [tasteful and appropriate] Halloween Let the Shredding Begin: Cuomo Scrutinizes Bankers' Bonuses

Vault welcomes your views. Please stay on topic and be respectful of other readers. Review our User Guidelines.

blog comments powered by Disqus

Featured Companies

Career Update Newsletter

Tips and tools to help you manage your ideal career.