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Things To Do Near Wall Street When You've Been Fired

Published: Jul 15, 2011

 Finance       

This week has been murderous on Wall Street.

swiss knifeAfter banks such as Goldman Sachs and Barclays Capital trimmed down their staffs, Credit Suisse and UBS have begun to slice bankers and wealth managers by the thousand. It's been said that BofA will be the next bank to slash scores of jobs, and earlier this week it was reported that Morgan Stanley is looking into ways to shave a significant number of heads from its payroll. In addition, rumors have been flying on both sides of the Atlantic about further redundancies on the horizon for more of the largest investment banks on the planet.

This dour finance news means that there will be plenty of Wall Street front-office, back-office, and support-staff employees without jobs in the coming weeks, if not already.

However, though losing a job is never easy, it's not, as they say, the end of the world. In fact, as I pointed out here a couple weeks back, it can be quite a boon. Indeed, there are many things to rejoice about when shown the door by your employer. For example, you are able to do things you otherwise wouldn't if you were gainfully employed, such as these:

Catch a matinee of Horrible Bosses, take in the mammals at the Bronx Zoo, jog in Central Park before noon then take an afternoon nap under an elderly sycamore, breakfast in Little India, visit Staten Island at sunrise via Ferry, walk the entire length of Broadway from Lower Manhattan to the tip of the Bronx, make grass angels in the Meadow, get a good spot on the lawn at Bryant Park for the upcoming August first showing of Cool Hand Luke ("shakin the tree boss, shakin the tree"), lunch with another out of work friend then saunter over two of the city's three bridges connecting Brooklyn to Manhattan, suntan on the High Line, get lost in the park called Prospect, read an entire novel in one day, or perhaps two novellas, enjoy a double feature, be thankful for your health (if you have it), see how long you can go without riding the subway or taking a taxi (my record while in NYC is eight days, six hours, and 47 minutes), read the print version of the Times in the morning shade, don't use email for 24 hours, 48 if you can get away with it, go to Penn Station and at the ticket booth say you want a one-way ticket and when the attendant asks where to tell him anywhere it doesn't matter just like they do in the movies and then buy it and ride where it says, go to Long Beach on a Tuesday, go to Rockaway Beach on a Thursday and have popcorn shrimp and a cold beverage at The Wharf, stay up all night, bike all day, leisurely swim the breast stroke in one of the city's 50-some public pools, daydream outside (as opposed to at your cubicle), and/or take the 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, A, B, C, D, E, F, G, J, L, M, N, Q, R, or Z as far north, south, or east as it will take you.

Or, of course, you can just take this: it easy.

(Reuters: UBS to Axe 5,000 jobs, CS to Cut 1,000)

(Related: Open Letter to Laid Off Wall Street Bankers and Traders)

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